I feel like Heavenly Father has been showering me with little teaching moments lately. The one that I've been pondering the past few days has to do with missionary work. Since we moved to Arizona last fall my missionary experiences have increased a couple hundred percent (not really an accomplishment since my previous missionary experiences were zero). I'm amazed at how affirming it has been for my own testimony to share and explain my beliefs to others. It's given me to a platform to share why I love my church and how the gospel blesses my life each day. It's fun people! However, I've also been surprised at how hard (almost scary) it has been to take the first step and begin the conversation with a potential investigator. I've missed some opportunities along the way because I haven't had the courage to open my mouth.
Why the lack of courage? Because I default to the belief that it's all up to me. And without His help it is kind of a terrifying prospect.
I don't rely enough on Him. I usually try and do "it"-whatever "it" is-by myself. (And then crash and burn. Not pretty.)
Anyway, I've been discouraged that our missionary efforts haven't followed the prescribed pattern of: an investigator a) meets with the missionaries and is taught the lessons b) reads/prays/studies c) feels the Spirit d) agrees to be baptized. That's the way it supposedly works when we talk about it in Sunday School or listen to a returned missionary's stories, right?
A few days ago, I picked up the most recent Conference edition of the Ensign and was skimming the table of contents. I really needed a talk to touch me and help me get through the day. I found myself intrigued by the title of Pres. Uchtdorf's talk from the April 2013 Young Women meeting "Your Wonderful Journey Home". And to my considerable surprise, these words were waiting for me:
"Life can be difficult, and it can harden hearts to the point where certain people seem unreachable. Some may be filled with anger. Others may mock and ridicule those who believe in a loving God. But consider this: though they do not remember, they too at one time yearned to return to their Father in Heaven. It is not your responsibility to convert anyone. That is the work of the Holy Ghost. Your task is to share your beliefs and to not be afraid."
It was amazing how light I felt after reading that. All that He's asked me to do is share my beliefs and not be afraid. I can do that. He's already promised that if I will just open my mouth He will fill it with the words I should say (D&C 33:8). He will make my feeble attempts enough and the real work of conversion was never mine to begin with.
So just like everything else in life, if we try and go it alone, our road will be impossibly difficult. But with the Lord "all things are possible". (Mark 10:27)
Why the lack of courage? Because I default to the belief that it's all up to me. And without His help it is kind of a terrifying prospect.
I don't rely enough on Him. I usually try and do "it"-whatever "it" is-by myself. (And then crash and burn. Not pretty.)
Anyway, I've been discouraged that our missionary efforts haven't followed the prescribed pattern of: an investigator a) meets with the missionaries and is taught the lessons b) reads/prays/studies c) feels the Spirit d) agrees to be baptized. That's the way it supposedly works when we talk about it in Sunday School or listen to a returned missionary's stories, right?
A few days ago, I picked up the most recent Conference edition of the Ensign and was skimming the table of contents. I really needed a talk to touch me and help me get through the day. I found myself intrigued by the title of Pres. Uchtdorf's talk from the April 2013 Young Women meeting "Your Wonderful Journey Home". And to my considerable surprise, these words were waiting for me:
"Life can be difficult, and it can harden hearts to the point where certain people seem unreachable. Some may be filled with anger. Others may mock and ridicule those who believe in a loving God. But consider this: though they do not remember, they too at one time yearned to return to their Father in Heaven. It is not your responsibility to convert anyone. That is the work of the Holy Ghost. Your task is to share your beliefs and to not be afraid."
It was amazing how light I felt after reading that. All that He's asked me to do is share my beliefs and not be afraid. I can do that. He's already promised that if I will just open my mouth He will fill it with the words I should say (D&C 33:8). He will make my feeble attempts enough and the real work of conversion was never mine to begin with.
So just like everything else in life, if we try and go it alone, our road will be impossibly difficult. But with the Lord "all things are possible". (Mark 10:27)
